Listen up! I am writing this piece specifically for those of you who are struggling to be successful.

Lord knows, given the financial sinkhole that we are in – some of us more “sunk” than others – it is imperative that a lifeline to sanity be thrown out to you.

I am sure that we will all agree that it can’t be a disappointment to read; just another piece of Social Media “How-To-Use-Twitter-and-Retire-at 21″ fluff or “Law-of-Attraction” spirituo-babble.

I assure you that this is real, tested and secure.

This does require a level of belief on your part that our passage through life – physically, emotionally, mentally and (dare I say it) spiritually – can be illuminated by a few simple (not easy) guidelines and instructions.

Are there really five steps to success?  Yes.

Moreover, you are already have traveled these steps!  I can declare with confidence that anyone reading this has been through the five steps at crisis points at some point in life and has come out on the other side “successfully.”  Not having a frame of reference, you just weren’t aware of it.

The difference going forward now will be that you will have a User’s Manual.

Five steps to Success. It’s really that simple. I didn’t say it was easy.

So, tighten your seat safety belt and come with me on this ride. It is a ride I personally have not always enjoyed over the span of my adult life, but have grown to understand and appreciate it as a requisite for growth.  And, you do want to grow, right?

For the purposes of this teaching – because that is what this is – we must agree on the definition of success… and that can be elusive.  For some, it consists of acquiring wealth, position or power.  For others, it could be in gaining wisdom or spirituality. In today’s reality, it could mean putting food on the table or having a job and a paycheck that will cash.

Whatever definition is true for you, you won’t have to give it up to benefit from The Five Steps.  Keep your personal definition if it is useful, and make room for the one below for the moment.  And, that is:

Success: The progressive realization of a worthwhile goal.

The very fact that it is “progressive” should be of solace. Things take time.  Behind every “overnight success” story is a history of hard work, disappointment, mis-steps and mini-triumphs.  It takes what it takes.

Perhaps that is why “time” was created…so that everything wouldn’t happen at once.   Time gives you the opportunity to manifest the “real-ity” of your dreams and goals…and for the moment we will consider them to be “worth the while.”

Now, back to the topic – Five Steps to Success.  On reflection, I believe you will discover that every impactful event in your life and the lives of others will be guided by these five steps.

Step #1 – Acknowledge the Truth

You may (or may not) be surprised at the difficulty of completing even this first, basic step.

Most people struggle, question, or go into combat against the truth.  Evidence can be found in statements like, “This can’t be happening to me.” “That isn’t true.” “No way.” Or even, “Maybe for you, but not for me.”

Truth – and I am not even talking about truth with a capital “T” – is not where a lot of people live.  Look around you.  Do you really think that we are living in anything other than a shared illusion?  And, that “truth” must be avoided at all cost to protect the reality we hold in common?

How can we claim as truth that all men are created equal, and then enact laws – and wage wars – to be sure that this will not be the case? How can we trumpet the superiority of unfettered (free market) Capitalism, then see how this has led to a financial meltdown of unprecedented damage within our lifetime – and still defend it?

What about your own truth? Are your finances a disaster? Does your job (if you have one) suck? Is your marriage or relationship lacking, or at a dead end? Is it time to ‘fold ‘em’ and move on to a new life?  Then, why aren’t you moving forward?

Because, most people do not want to acknowledge the truth.  And, until they they (you?) do, will be stuck in that reality.  Perhaps we can’t deal with the grief that such an acknowledgment would bring?  Or face the fact that we must move forward?

There are parallels to be found in The Five Stages of Grief, the pioneering work on death and dying written by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross a few years back.  Based on her research and conclusions, whenever we experience a significant loss, we must go through our grief if we are to heal.

How many of us still set the table for two, when only one remains? Like a very dim-witted mouse, how many of us go back to where the cheese was, and is no longer?  Again, and again.

Whatever the larger truth is for you – acknowledge it – “The truth shall set ye free.”

Step #2 – Surrender to the Truth

If you think the first step was tough – try this one.

People would rather battle truth to the death than to accept it. Again, there are parallels to the grief process.  First, we resist the truth (denial), and next we find ourselves deep in anger.  As part of the grief process, this is normal, it is natural, and can be anticipated.

You don’t happen to be angry about anything, would you?  If so, if you stay at this stage you are “stuck.”

The anger which flowed like molten lava from the ranks of the “Tea-Party” folk is a great example.   Although they have succeeded in getting past the first stage (they have “acknowledged the truth” about the terrible state of the nation’s economy), they are in large part mired in anger and blame.

They are in no way surrendering to that truth, which is larger than ideology or politics.  They would (as we all do) rather search about for a guilty party and vent their wrath. They are caught up – lost – in the terror of their version of reality.  The likelihood of their moving on to the next of the five steps is as likely as their finding the north pole by heading south.

Which gives you an idea of what the future looks like for the U.S. Congress.  Stuck in hate; stuck in reverse.

Which begs the question – what makes your version of anger – or how it is directed – any different or more justifiable? Why aren’t you surrendering? Would you rather be right, or would you rather be effective?

Surrendering does not mean resignation, an important point to understand and practice.  It means to accept “what is” and is a necessary prerequisite to doing “what’s next.”

Step #3 – Trust the Process

What the hell does that mean?  Trust has been betrayed so many times, it would seem that the concept is meaningless…or from another time.

What trust means in this context, my friend, is that all of us are “in process” in some fashion or another in our daily struggles. By understanding and consciously incorporating this principle of trust, that somehow we are watched over and directed, we will worry and agonize less about the outcome and be more available to creative solutions.

Consider:  we are undergoing this experience for reasons beyond our limited understanding; and that there could be a purpose beyond what are senses are telling us.

And that requires faith.

Sometimes this faith can be found in a higher being (Father And I Together Here), other times in believing in ourselves or others, or in our chosen path.  Sometimes, it is in wisely stepping back to allow matters to take their own course – with or without out our permission.

I can fairly well guarantee you that life goes on largely without our permission, anyway. But, it does require our participation.

Which leads to Step Four…

Step #4 – Participate positively 100%

We are going to be led into temptation here; watch out.

Let’s imagine a situation in which a divorce or job loss is coming about…events that occurs in our lives or in the lives of our friends and relatives.  In this case, let us say that this is happening to us, and that we are following The Five Steps faithfully.

We have acknowledged the truth (this marriage, this job is over), surrendered to the truth (accepted the divorce or termination papers), are hopeful for a resolution that will work in the form of a better partner or a better career opportunity (trusting the process), and now someone on the other side is making – demands!

What constitutes a positive response here – that we roll over and give in to every demand? Locate a more aggressive attorney to protect us? Tough call.

Participating Positively 100% means to choose the path or solution that serves the truth at question. Not your truth, or the other party’s truth, but perhaps the children’s truth, or that of your financial reality – or the truth that giving up a little now may result in a better relationship later.

If that isn’t comprehensible, than ask yourself what participating “negatively” would look like.  That doesn’t take much imagination; we have all experienced the pain of throwing good energy after bad.  Once you identify what constitutes a negative course of action…and the logical results that will come about…do the opposite.

Step #5 – Everything serves the Process

To quote Stephen Covey – “We are not human beings on a spiritual journey. We are spiritual beings on a human journey.”

Taken from this higher point of view, it can be argued that everything that happens is for our own best interests…if we understand that it is in our best interests to grow.  “Ships in harbor may be safe, but that is not what ships are made for” must be your mantra going forward.

Glenn Beck serves the process. Hurricane Katrina serves the process. The greedy bastards of Wall Street serve the process. Plowing your way through this blog…serves the process.

If there is one ray of hope and wisdom we can extract from the bible, it is in understanding that “…and it came to pass” did not continue on to say “…and it came to stay.”

You and I were built to be survivors. Sometimes, in spite of circumstances if not because of them.

If you follow The Five Steps, it will be impossible to not see your life and your process as anything less than successful.  Don’t believe it?  OK, go back to the top of this blog and begin with Step #1.

There is one true thing about how the Universe works.  If you don’t “GET IT,” the lesson will be repeated until you do.